He said a sentence I think he had read on a subtitle track, something about wrecking me that did not belong in his actual mouth. I laughed so hard I had to sit up. He looked wounded. I put the kettle on. We drank tea in the near-dark and agreed that filth, if we were going to do it, had to sound like us.

These dirty talk examples are the lines that did not do that. Plus a few I would walk out on. Steal them. Change one word so they sound like your kitchen, not a download. How to talk dirty is the method. This is the swipe file I wish I had when my mouth was empty and my pride was loud.

Dirty talk phrases work when they describe, praise, or ask. They fail when they sound like a script the body has not agreed to. I have said both kinds. The second kind is how you end up making tea for the wrong reasons.

Beginner lines that describe

Start with what is already happening. I have used every one of these. None of them required a new personality.

  1. “Stay there.”
  2. “That, slower.”
  3. “Don’t you move.”
  4. “I can feel that.”
  5. “Your mouth is making me impatient.”
  6. “You’re so warm.”
  7. “Look at what you’re doing to me.”
  8. “I want that again.”
  9. “Right there. Yes.”
  10. “Keep your hand.”

Number nine is the one I have said most. It is not clever. It keeps him from inventing a new move. I have watched a perfectly good night leave because someone thought silence meant they should get creative.

Examples of dirty talk do not need to be long. If you can say it while you are still being touched, it is the right length. If you need to pause the sex to deliver it, it is a speech. I have delivered a speech. He nodded, politely, and went soft.

What to say during sex examples, at this level, are just navigation with heat on. You are not auditioning for a part. You are telling a person with a body where to stay.

Praise

Praise is easier if you mean it. I do not compliment a performance I am enduring. I name the bit I want repeated. If I cannot find a true compliment, I ask for a change instead. Fake praise is how you get more of the thing you were trying to retire.

  1. “You feel good.”
  2. “I like you like this.”
  3. “Good. Like that.”
  4. “You’re being so careful with me.”
  5. “I love your hands.”
  6. “You look pleased with yourself. You should.”
  7. “That’s my favourite.”
  8. “I could do this for an hour.”

Fourteen surprised me. I said it to someone who was going slowly because he was nervous, and the nervousness turned into pride. Pride is useful if it keeps him where he is.

Sixteen is cheek. Use it only if you already like each other. I used it once on a first night and it landed like a teacher. We recovered, later, with a glass of water in the kitchen. I retired it for strangers. Cheek needs a history. On a first night I stay with twelve and thirteen, which are dull and kind.

A bit filthier

These are the ones I can say when the room is already hot. If you put them in the first minute, you may get tea. I have been the woman who went too filthy too early and then had to climb back down to “your hand, just there,” which is where we should have started.

  1. “I want you inside me.”
  2. “Fuck, that’s good.”
  3. “I’m so wet that’s on you.”
  4. “I want to feel you come.”
  5. “Harder. I can take it.”
  6. “Use your mouth. I didn’t say stop.”
  7. “You can go deeper. Slow.”
  8. “I want you to ruin my morning.”
  9. “Tell me how I feel.”
  10. “Don’t you dare finish yet.”

Twenty-six I said on a grey morning in my flat, blinds still down, and we were late for nothing important. It was filth and a diary note at once. That is the flavour I trust.

Twenty-one is true or I do not say it. I have tried lying this kind of line. It sounds like a receipt. He knew. I knew. We both pretended, which is a kind of dirt I do not enjoy.

Twenty-seven works when I actually want the answer. If I ask him to tell me how I feel and then I flinch at the word he chooses, that is on me for opening a door I had not checked. I ask only when I can hear a wrong answer without leaving my body.

If English is not the language you dream in, say them in the one you moan in. I would rather hear honest words in another language than a perfect filthy sentence that does not belong to you. I have come to a man speaking a language I only half knew. The half I knew was enough.

Text versions

Shorter than a paragraph. Longer than a single wink. I have sent these. I have also stared at them and deleted two adjectives, which is my usual edit. For pacing and photos, use the sexting piece. These are just the sentences.

  1. “I’m still thinking about your mouth.”
  2. “If you were here I would put your hand here.”
  3. “Tell me what you would do first.”
  4. “I’m in the queue and I am not thinking about the queue.”
  5. “Come over. I don’t want to be polite.”
  6. “I keep crossing my legs in this meeting for a reason.”
  7. “Write me something you wouldn’t say in the hallway.”

Thirty-two I sent from a chemist, which is a terrible place to feel smug and also an honest one. He replied with one line. That was enough. I bought plasters I did not need so the woman at the till would not see my face.

Thirty-four I sent from a meeting I should have been in. I do not recommend it. The heat was real. The minutes were wasted. I now keep the filthy texts for after I have left the building.

If they leave you on read, you do not send a filthier follow-up. You go and make dinner. I have learnt that the expensive way: two more messages, then a thin apology from me the next day for a silence that was not a crime.

Lines I would walk out on

These are not spicy. These are a door.

  1. Anything that makes me a child, or uses a schoolgirl voice. I will leave. I will not debate it.
  2. “You like that, you little slut,” from a man who has not asked whether slut is a word I want. Sometimes I do. Never as a surprise.
  3. A paragraph of what he will do to me that sounds copied, including the commas.
  4. Comparing me, out loud, to someone else he has had. I do not care if he thinks it is praise.
  5. “Shut up and take it” when I have not asked to be shut up. Heat is one thing. Being silenced is another.

I walked out on thirty-eight in a flat that was not mine. I found my tights under the sofa and did not leave a note. He texted “too much?” I said “not mine.” That was all I owed him.

Thirty-six is not a debate I have at the door. If a man borrows underage language, the night is over. I have heard it dressed as a joke. The joke did not save it.

Degradation is a kink some people like. If you write it, you explain it, you agree it, you do not pour it over a stranger and call it an example of dirty talk. I have said “slut” to a man who had asked for it, and I have left a man who used it as a greeting. Same word. Different door.

Is it okay to repeat a phrase? Yes. I have come to the same six words more than once. Variation is how people get nervous and invent a subtitle. If you are bored of your own sentence, whisper it closer, do not replace it with a paragraph.

FAQ

What are good dirty talk examples?

The ones that describe what is happening, or praise what you want repeated, in a voice you would still own in the morning. Stay there. You feel good. I want that. Then, if the room is already hot, the filthier cousins. If you need more method than a list, start with how to talk dirty.

What should I say during sex?

One true sentence. Then stop long enough for them to use it. If you freeze, name a sensation. Wet, slow, there. You can ask for what you want in the same breath.

Is it okay to repeat a phrase?

Yes. Repeating is how a body learns what to stay with. I would rather hear “right there” four times than a new paragraph that knocks me out of it.

What if English is not my first language?

Use the language you actually feel in. A simple sentence you mean will beat a fluent line you borrowed. I have been with men who switched mid-breath. It was hotter than anything they had prepared.